Jump to Navigation

Login / Register

St Cago bike polo mallets DZR bike shoes for street and bike polo Velolocuma bicycles Riding in Circles

Hop on The Porny Express

MKE poster
EastVan Polo action
the view from above
submission from Berlin
 Hop on The Porny Express

Last summer I celebrated my bike polo 10 year anniversary! It was AWESOME and it wouldn't be possible without the network of rad bikers all over the world.

For 7 of those 10 year I have curated for Bike Smut, a touring program of erotic bicycle films. We are quite possibly the most ethical graphic content anywhere and we are touring with an all new program now (one of which features hardcourt bike polo)!

Bike Smut works to create communication about sex, gender, identity and transportation in a positive way. Through workshops, dance parties, lectures, discussion groups, potlucks, craft nights, POLO TOURNAMENTS and naked/underwear/themed bike rides Bike Smut helps communities define obscenity. The shared experience brings the private matter of porn into the public, throwing the Victorian era taboos out the window.

Bike Smut is civic. Current political policies are designed to repress sexual expression and transportation choice. The Bike Smut film festival challenges that trend by enthusiastically displaying the quality of creative expression and the amount of fun inherent in both cycling and sex. Both actives are worth elements of a healthy lifestyle and a pleasant quality of life. -Jeff Jacobson

This year the submissions come from artists in Oakland, Vancouver, Chicago, Gainesville, Montreal, Berlin, Milan and Zuirch! Literally and figuratively all over the map. Above you see a few screen shots from this year's program...

Bike Smut 7: The Porny Express

We dont put films online or on DVDs, the only way to see it is at a screening of consensual adults. Sex is everywhere in our culture but unless we take the opportunity to engage it directly we are limiting ourselves. Taken another way, if we are not mature enough to talk about sex we don't have any business doing it.

This year I am touring via bicycle. This is something we have not done since the original tour took us from Portland to Vancouver BC back in 2007 (back when I was among the world's greatest polo players). I plan to slay with as many of you as we can schedule but I need your help. Write me and let me know what days of the week you play polo. I have my own mallet but my tour bike should not be on the court so bring me a steel steed to rock, please!

Since we started touring in June I have got to play polo with clubs in Anchorage, Portland, East Van, Seattle, Ogden and Denver. These were some really great polo scenes, I hope you get to travel and play there yourself.

Coming up soon Ill be in Minneapolis (9/13), Madison (9/20), Milwaukee (9/22), Chicago (9/28), Detroit, Toronto, Ottawa and Montreal before I start riding south.

Its gonna be a big challenge to ride and play and make all these dates but if we start working on it soon we can make some really awesome things happen. Ping me up!

email: BikeSmut@gmail.com


I am willing to bottom-line a showing at the Bike Church in Santa Cruz again this year. It'd be great to get some PR material ahead of time to spread the word. Place to crash and loaner polo bike and mallets available as well!

shotgun your bike!

Hawt damn! Thats the kind of reply I love to see!!

It will be a while before we make it to Santa Cruz, prob Spring of 2014 but you can believe we will make a point of staining the church in the best of ways!

We have a pretty excellent press pack, now attached!

porny Express-PressPack.pdf1.92 MB

Like the Care Bears said, "sharing (bicycles, F/OSS, alcohol and Josh's Mom...) is caring"

Please please please come to North Carolina!

Thanks Sam! Ive never been to Raleigh and would be thrilled to check it out!

Like the Care Bears said, "sharing (bicycles, F/OSS, alcohol and Josh's Mom...) is caring"

One more day in Minneapolis then to Madison, MKE and Chicago!

Like the Care Bears said, "sharing (bicycles, F/OSS, alcohol and Josh's Mom...) is caring"

What an amazing show!

The City tried to shut us down but we were resilient and blew it up at an even larger venue!


This Friday we are in Madison, then Milwaukee on Sunday!

Like the Care Bears said, "sharing (bicycles, F/OSS, alcohol and Josh's Mom...) is caring"

Played some fabulous polo in Boston!

in this photo we see how fireworks encourage more expedient play.

also notable is their World Naked Bike Ride is growing every year!

Our show in Boston is tomorrow,
Tuesday, Oct 29th
389 Congress Street, 7th Floor
FB event: https://www.facebook.com/events/556808791040973/

then we are in Brooklyn this Friday November 1st
Silent Barn
603 Bushwick Ave,
Adults only
with costumed dance party to follow

Looking at shows in Penn, RVA, North Carolina and Tennessee!

  • bostonPoloFireworks.jpg
  • alyssaStoneBostonWNBR.jpg

Like the Care Bears said, "sharing (bicycles, F/OSS, alcohol and Josh's Mom...) is caring"

Its been a good long ride but we have got to swing it with some good crews around the south!

I nearly rode back to back centuries in order to make it from RVA to Raleigh. they have a pretty sweet crew there! Sam and Steven treated me like a king! Steven gave me a cured ham to bring with me to a bike porno-potluck in Asheville.

The winter had come and I was heading into its path. I missed the folks in Asheville by a few miserable hours and a terrifying late night descent down Mount Mitchel in some freezing mist/rain. Thankfully my body was able to heal up after the abuse i put it through and I was on to Knoxville. The Birdcage was a great venue but they had torn their kitchen apart. I didn't end up cooking that fucking ball of salty pork until Nashville. Some Rat Patrol bikepunks who were hosting a Thanksgiving feast and I was happy to put it in my belly.

By the time I made it to Memphis it had warmed up for my ride.

I got into town in time to play polo, get beer, break Steely Wander at the hitch… again. fuck. ditch it in the Bank of America parking lot. HA! take my metal waste! then play great polo for hours. i convince some first timers to give it a shot. they love it. i love it. it feels so good to see people try something new because they are encouraged to. One guy had been there watching the sport for 3 months and never tried it. he thanked me profusely and said he never would have done it were it not for me. aw shucks. I blush.

i think the trick is getting them on a bike between games. less intimidating and more ball time.

Jumping ahead I made it to Atlanta without much problems then rode to Athens. Got my 2nd flat of the tour (both on my trailer, thank you Marathons) but pulled in around midnight. The Athens polo folks organized an early match. Erica and I were feeling it! I played with this crew when we came though 3-4 years ago and had a great time again. I had to leave early to turn the 3 Kings pub into a micro theater but thankfully we had some good help.

Now im in Jacksonville, FL at the Polo (porno) Pizza Party!

its pretty sweet, ill have some pics from that soon!

  • IMG-20131118-00588raleigh.jpg
  • IMG-20131204-00788memphis.jpg
  • IMG-20131128-00681.jpg
  • IMG-20131127-00670.jpg
  • IMG-20131204-00786.jpg

Like the Care Bears said, "sharing (bicycles, F/OSS, alcohol and Josh's Mom...) is caring"

and BOOYA, here are some pics from the first day of the PIZZA POLO PORNO PARTY


SFW (provided you dont click around too much once you are on our tumblr)

Like the Care Bears said, "sharing (bicycles, F/OSS, alcohol and Josh's Mom...) is caring"